This illustrates my bloody point.

This is deeper than usual. But I can’t post party pictures everyday right? Anyway, recently, I remembered an argument/discussion I had with an ex-girlfriend at some point…

I forgot how we even got to this topic, but the crux was this: I put forth that it was better for someone to be able to help someone else and have the capability to do so, even if that person had negative or dubious intent (eg, wanted to get paid, or helped in return, etc). She said that it was more important that the person who wanted to help was sincere, regardless of that person’s capability (good intentions). Do a person’s moral motivations trump over utility?

Which brings to mind. If say, you left your car headlights on, and then your battery died, and you needed someone to help you get your car jump started:

Would it be better if :

(a) A stranger dropped by, helped you, but charged you RM150 for 3 minutes work due to him having the right resources (like a battery and jumper cables).
(b) A friend dropped by, couldn’t help you, but offered some encouraging words, and wished you luck. And he asked you to call him later to see if you’re okay.
(c) Someone dropped by and helped you get your car started for free because he is a kind hearted, genuine person who wishes to help you and expects nothing.

While (b) is heartwarming, it is essentially useless. The ‘friend’ did not take effort to help you, and further, wishes to assuage his guilt by asking you to notify him/her when the situation is resolved. And while (a) is heartbreaking (humanity is selfish and calculating, sigh), it essentially helped you solve your problem, at a price. Option (c) is perfect, however, it does not exist often. It is essentially, a false ideal.

Holding yourself to an ideal and expecting people to follow those ideals…does not make it happen.

Here’s a quote by Margaret Thatcher: “No one would remember the Good Samaritan if he’d only had good intentions—he had money as well.”

What you can learn from this:

• If you are to only accept help from well intentioned people with the capability to help you…be prepared to wait a very long time. It may not even come.
• Sometimes, you have to get help from people with dubious motives.
• Not all people who are friendly and accomodating, can actually help you.
• In the rare case that you do find someone who has good intent, and good delivery, you are damn lucky.

Conclusion, and what it means for you: As a member of the human race, as someone with presumably has friends - it is to your advantage, and to those around you, that even as nice as a person that you are, you should build up your capabilities and resources as much as possible to make sure that when your help is needed - you can actually offer, and deliver upon it.